Don’t Say Something To Yourself That You Wouldn’t Say To A Friend…

23 thoughts on “Don’t Say Something To Yourself That You Wouldn’t Say To A Friend…”

  1. Therese, I was introduced to this site… just today! I landed on your post. i am speechless at your process and insight. I love your accountability and transparency. Thank you for sharing your revolution… and ongoing evolution. By the way,

  2. Thank you so much. I love how you put it. We should not say things to ourselves that we would not say to others. What a wonderful way to look at it. Thanks

  3. I really enjoyed your post. I am printing out the serenity prayer and putting it in my room here in Iraq. I remember when they notified me that I would leave my 7 month old baby in 2 weeks I was so upset but each day is easier and easier. Your post made me realize that this prayer fits into my life perfectly. Thank you, Nadine

    1. It’s a very powerful prayer. I’m so glad it helped. And thank you for leaving your comforts here to secure them for the rest of us! I hope you get to see your baby soon.

  4. Thanks for posting this and the serenity prayer. You really are beautiful & your post was great. 🙂

  5. I am very much in the same boat! It is great to know someone else feels the same. A friend and I were recently talking about self esteem… she said to me “at least you have enough confidence to go in public with a ponytail, no make up and comfy clothes.” I smiled and shrugged it off, really I was thinking “if you only knew that I can’t stand to look at myself in the mirror long enough to put make-up on, let alone struggle through putting in contacts and putting my hair in a ponytail.”

    I tell my husband on a regular basis that I wish I could fin da way to love myself… but I just can’t seem to get past the weight I’ve gained since high school. Anyone have any tips on how to get to a place where I love myself and can see the beauty that my husband obviously does?

    1. I know everyone doesn’t agree with this, but prayer helps! Gentle yoga and meditation could serve the same purpose.

      Also, I focused on eating 5 servings of fruits and veggies a day, and just that one simple step made me FEEL better inside and look healthier on the outside. That helped a lot. Then I felt well enough to work out a few times a week.

      Finally, like the Desiderata says, “Beyond a wholesome discipline,
      be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.”

  6. Oh…… I’m so glad to see this site… it lift me up… thank u so much for such a wonderful words…

  7. I truly do think you are BEAUTIFUL! The pics you shared show how you have a true zest for life! THis was really encouraging…. I just ate a ton of chocalate and felt horrible about myself and I litterally googled “How do I forgive myself for eating so much?” and this site came up. Thank you for your inspiring words and gorgeous smile!!!!:)

  8. Wow, girl, you got a tear sparkling in my eye!
    First of all, I see you were just like me – or better to say, I am like you were.
    Yes, this level of self-acceptance I’ve found in you, so well written in your story, is what I didin’t achieved yet. But now, after reading your confession, I know at least it’s doable, and what are the steps I should find in me on my own – a big thank you for that!
    Second thing I’d like to tell you is, you’re beautiful!!! Nothing in your look should make you worry. And as I read you, nothing in your heart should make you worry either :). Keep this positive attitude, and share it with others as much as you can! (The bad atmosphere among your work colleagues and friends can be beaten with this kind of caring love attitude so well – I know that for sure :)).
    Best of luck for all your goals and thoughts!
    Thank you again & stay positive!

  9. You are so incredibly beautiful. Your smile and the warmth that I can feel just by reading this makes you amazing. You are amazing.

  10. Therese, i just wanted to say you’re really beautiful. But not only on the outside, in the inside too. No, especially on the inside. I just came through your note, and i want to believe it was faith or something because it’s really helping me a lot right now (And i have to confess i cried reading it). It’s just, i really can relate to this. You see, i’m a 15 year old girl who’s really insecure about itself. And this is not a recent thing, i can’t remember a moment of my childhood where i weren’t afraid of taking a picture, or if i had to take one of me i tried to not smile because of my croocked teeth. There’s literally about 20 pictures of me from when i was a kid, and most of them where for the school. So you can imagine how hard it is to learn how to love yourself and stop hurting yourself when you haven’t done it in your whole life. But that phrase you posted “I can’t change the way I look, but I can change the way I see” really blew my mind. So what i’m trying to do now is that, instead of hiding from mirrors, i’m gonna confront them. Most of the times is hard, i end up crying and wanting to punch something, but there’s also a few times when i smile and see positive things to myself instead of bad things, like “Look how good your eyes look” or “Your hair looks so pretty today”. And i just want to say a massive thanks to you, because your words really inspired me. One more thing, sorry if i have a bad grammar, i’m not from the U.S.

  11. I am awed by you. You are an absolutely beautiful woman. What’s funny is you say about not wearing makeup etc but my husband thinks a woman is sexiest in natural beauty! I can not waste my life worrying about what people think of me, I need to be worried about what I think of me. I cried reading the scale note BC it’s so true. I know people who are overweight and think they are beautiful, because they are beautiful inside!
    Keep being who you are!

  12. I love the goals of this site and I really really love the title of this post. It’s both obvious and simultaneously deep at the same time. After reading the title I realized that of *course* if we’re going to have to be good to ourselves, we must treat ourselves as as we would treat a friend. Thanks for the insight. BTW, I’m not a part of the peer group here, but more of an “ally” I guess, since I’m a 53 year old male living in KC. Please keep being your own best friend! Negative internal conversations are not healthy, and keeping them in check is a great idea.

  13. You are sooo pretty on the outside. Who wouldn’t want to look like you.
    We all have things we need to change. On the inside and outside.
    Sometimes makeup can make ppl feel better. I personally think that you need a glad rags approach. You look good and are good no matter what you wear. Keep up the good work.

  14. I am big with the negative talk! But I am a great friend; and when you put it that way; I’d never say to a friend what I say to myself. That’s what I need to start thinking of myself as a friend. I have a hard time liking me; but it needs to change. If I think like a friend; I’ll go a lot easier on myself.

    Thanks for the wisdom.

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